A helpful guide to self obsession

 

Urban Dictionary describes being self obsessed as

The act of being constantly preoccupied with the thought of yourself and everything in this world that involves you or should involve you. A self-obsessed individual is someone who just can’t help thinking and talking about themselves.

Sometimes it happens, you give into self obsession and do a little vanity test. It’s a good Sunday afternoon hangover challenge.

Its a pretty good show of character when your narcissism is so overpowering that you’re squinting into a computer screen, whilst holding a cold pint of milk on your forehead, because you’d rather delve into the made up personality disorder that you have than leave your bed to get paracetamol. But to me that just shows a thrifty and resilient person.

Either way, spending more than two seconds considering questions like You know how to put every minute of your time to good purpose, YES or NO? without the irony jumping out at you is a pretty sure sign that you should stop drinking.

However, in my house we have an architect, a champion and a supervisor. I love how certain that sounds and I buy it, in the same way I selectively read horoscopes when they sound promising. How can titles like that not be made for that morning after you drank too many Mojitos and thought you were a salsa dancer.

Whilst you’re there you might aswell make a new entry of your full name in Urban Dictionary to further inflate your ego. Its kind of like hangover therapy.

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